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April 2006
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Designed by: hawKS
Pictures from: ~nandolucas
Codings: Ebullient*

you have no idea how many times i've said, "okay, i'll blog tonight" and got all excited cos i've so much to talk about.

but i've been pretty occupied since my last entry and i've been sleeping late and my body's been very tired and...you get the drift.

so here's a short one to wish all muslims Eid Mubarak!

i think i like him. or maybe i don't. i hate this.

Selamat Hari Raya, you all. Here's seeking forgiveness if i have offended any of you with my actions or words be it in person, or through this blog. Lots of loveeeee!
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Ramadhan On Wheels had been such a cool experience for me. 'cept i should have expected the unexpected.

anyway, i had been grouped with the most fabulous bunch of people. i bet the other groups weren't half as kecoh as we were. my group, otherwise known as "Car 18" consisted of the 2 gorgeous ladies, Kak Mariah & Kak Melati, and the 2 strong men, Hamzi & Han Teck, otherwise referred to as Cantek. and yours truly.

Kak Mariah was the one driving, and i had to sit in front with her. seeing her drive her own car, made me excited to get my own practical lessons over and done with. let me drive already! i've passed both my basic & final theory tests, and my dad's car has been calling out to me..."when will you drive me, oh fizaaa?"

i digress.

nobody told me the Warna Ramadhan crew was gonna be following us and interviewing us! i was ready to be all messy and serabai 'cause we would be moving around alot. and i just had to wake up late. which meant no time to blow-dry my shabby hair, and no time for routine make-up on face. damn. at least the 2 hosts were nice. im not sure of their names...err Fendy & Huda, i think. from Anugrah Skrin.

so anyway, that's EXACTLY what i looked like. unkempt & oily-faced. but i don't care. in fact, i felt the crew were more of a hindrance. we had to rush through the first 2 houses and didn't really get to interact with the families. what a waste. and did i mention, a bird decided to empty it's bowel on me & my white tee? cobaan.

and did i mention i made a fool out myself on national tv...for the SECOND time? yes, i fumbled on my words. too many times. people, start speaking malay to me. and everytime i speak english to you, make me say it back in full malay.

but it had been a totally fun day with the group, meeting the families, driving into oncoming traffic... HAHA. it's okay, Kak Mariah...at least you have a nice car =)

155 families, 200 volunteers, 37 cars.

it's been a fruitful Saturday...Alhamdulillah.

my awesome group members with baby putri...

some of us got to break fast at Alkaff Mosque...

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Astaghfirullah'alazim. I feel horrible for the bad things i've done unconsciously, especially this being the month of Ramadhan. so many tests & trials. so many temptations, too many succumbed. Astaghfirullah'alazim.

piz dearest and i had been involved with Ramadhan On Wheels yesterday. it was really nice seeing the familiar faces, catching up after months has passed.

but what was really nice was meeting *Sakti (not real name, but some of you may know who i'm talking about. heh.) after such a long time. he's one of the very few people whom i really have respect for and look up to.

you see, there's not many like Sakti nowadays. alot of us youths tend to place importance on hidup di dunia and totally forget or ignore the importance bila hidup di akhirat nanti. some youths are audacious enough to claim that being religious is uncool. subhanAllah.

but Sakti, he's cool in his very own cool way, yet he does not forget his responsibilities as a Muslim.

after the debrief, Piz & I found ourselves talking about him. we were thinking how fortunate the girl who marries him...

or at least, we were discussing how he is the kind of guy we should look for as a life partner. (not that i'm thinking of getting married anytime soon. na'ah. i will afterall ONLY be turning 19 this november!)

so people, apart from your usual 'handsome and charming with a sense of humour' (heh), 'pious' should be another important criteria when looking for your dream guy.

well, piz already found her 'handsome and charming with sense of humour and pious' boyfriend. i really hope she'll be happy with him, unlike her previous ass of a boyfriend.

Allahumma inni as-aluka hubbaq

:: Ya Allah, aku memohon untuk mencintaiMu

Wahubba man yuhibbuq

:: dan aku bermohon untuk aku mencintai orang-orang yang mencintaiMu

Wakulla amalin yukarribuni ila hubbiq

:: dan setiap amal yang mendekatkan diriku untuk mencintaiMu

Amiin.

im thankful to God i was strong enough on that friday...and i guess the presence of jannah and massurah helped as well. that situation felt all too familiar. it was too easy a trap to fall into, and it almost seemed okay to yes. astaghfirullah'alazim.
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i am so hungry, i need to shop.
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i've only missed ONE body combat class last week, but it feels as though i've missed a month's worth of class. what the hell is wrong with me? i think im addicted. im so obviously hooked!

anyway, the reason why i missed body combat last week was 'cause i was at the Esplanade to catch the Forbidden City! it was fabulous and worth skipping body combat for. even though Kit Chan's supposedly the star of the show, i felt the older Empress was most outstanding. there was that one scene where she realised that she was betrayed which almost got me to tears.

i realise that i've been hanging out alot with the people from the coming CeMTA musical that's going to be staged in November, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat. fun bunch.

and i also miss having crushes. a lovely girl i've jst made friends with has a crush on one of the guys in the musical and i so know what it feels like.

when he's not there, you wonder where he is. when he's there, you don't dare to look him in the eye...just in case he could tell. when he stands near, your heart starts pumping doubly fast. you can barely speak when he's near, so you'll just be satisfied to watch him from far. *sigh*

but no one has caught my attention at the moment.

i need to go shopping!
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i feel nervous after reading this brochure my dad received. it's encouraging people to make it a habit to keep at least 2 weeks supply of food per person at home, in case of an emergency where we may be required to stay at home for a long period.

what with the all the issues between singapore and the neighbouring country going on, i'm starting to feel nervous. suddenly, i started to imagine what it's like for those people living in a country with political unrest. war, bombings...not knowing what's gonna happen next. and forget about hanging out with friends til late night. it must be tragic to live in fear your whole life...

i guess a lot of singaporeans, like myself, have been taking the safety & security of our country for granted. and people have become too desensitized to violence, war & terrorism that's in the news every single day.

na'uzubillah min zalik

one shudders to think...
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please forgive me for that sudden outburst. pms, i think. but what happened last night left me feeling sore.

although, i do feel better now after meeting up with the guys who decided to come down to bukit batok. like, finally. it has always been me going elsewhere to meet people. i'm AWARE that there's nothing much at bukit batok, but it's not like we do much anyway! so after helping my mom out with the food and ran some errands, met faiz & juz and went to the library. i haven't laughed out so loud at the children's section of the library in a looong time. and there were only 3 of us, mind you.

after today, i've also come to realise that there are alot of weird people around my neighbourhood. i've chosen to ignore people like that during the 5 years i've lived here...even the reaaallyy freaky ones.

but i got a little worried when faiz messaged me about how a crazy man was freaking him out. apparently, that crazy man was pestering him and kept asking him for money even after he said he didn't have any. didn't help that the way he messaged me made it seem so serious!

but of course, he survived.

the moral of the story is:

be wary of shady characters and be careful of the "tone" of your message 'cause it can make your friends worry unecessarily!

buat suspens je...
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